Newbie:
We’ll begin with the Environmental Division. Here we are currently researching four species of Yōkai: the “Shiri-nugui,” “Yuki-onna,” “Fujitsubo,” and the “Kusabōbō.”

Mainly, I’d like for you to look at this sleeping yuki-onna, Yuki-chan. We believe she is hibernating because she might melt due to global warming. In my opinion, I think if she woke up, it could cause global cooling…

Shiri-nugui:
Hey, Miss Newbie? Don’t you think that’s a bit too simple? Global warming may be a “hot” topic in Japan, but what the world’s experiencing now is actually “climate change.” Ice in the North Pole melting, blizzards in the desert…Thanks to human mismanagement, Mother Nature’s computer is well on its way to a system crash.

Kusabōbō:
Ahem…that is why I, Kusabōbō, am here. When it comes to restoring the beauty of our green earth, I don’t rest. I am constantly absorbing the carbon dioxide that causes climate change! Even if humans keep repelling me and calling me a “weed”...I won’t give up! I’m gonna save the world! Right, Fujitsubo?

Fujitsubo:
Well, aren’t we positive? I, on the other hand, gotta deal with their garbage polluting the oceans. So I’ve taken to giving those dirty humans warts. It’s all I can do to protect the environment now.

Shiri-nugui:
Either way, we are all “cleaning up,” aren’t we? I thought I was the only one, but you’re all working hard, too. All I want to do is keep the toilets pristine, but there’s too many other messes to wipe…

Newbie:
With all this noise, I wonder if Yuki will wake up for us…

Fujitsubo:
Hey, hey, hey, Missy. You really tryin’ to wake Yuki up somewhere she’d melt? What if Yuki just wants to keep snoozing? Did you think of that?

Yuki-onna:
…

Newbie:
T-that’s certainly true. I didn’t consider Yuki’s feelings…

What is important is not whether Yuki can solve the world’s problems or not, but that we solve them ourselves. Whether she wakes up or decides to keep sleeping, that will be up to her…

I've made a note for future research. And if any of you come up with a brilliant idea for solving climate change, please contact us at the Laboratory. Next, we will proceed to the Financial Division.